5 Reasons Why The Giant Supermarket Robot "Marty" is a Terrible Idea - Wooder Ice
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5 Reasons Why The Giant Supermarket Robot “Marty” is a Terrible Idea

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5 Reasons Why The Giant Supermarket Robot “Marty” is a Terrible Idea

5 Reasons Why The Giant Supermarket Robot “Marty” is a Terrible Idea

5 Reasons Why The Giant Supermarket Robot “Marty” is a Terrible Idea

If you haven’t heard the news yet, run for the hills the robots are coming!  Giant Food Stores just announced they they will be introducing Marty, their giant robot with big eyes at all of their 173 stores across Pennsylvania, Maryland, Virginia and West Virginia.  Marty was originally a test pilot program in several PA markets, the regional supermarket chain decided to roll it out at all locations.

Marty’s is equipped with a label that reads “This store is monitored by Marty for your safety.  Marty is an autonomous robot that uses image capturing technology to report spills, debris and other potential hazards to store employees to improve your shopping experience.”   As if this is suppose to calm our nerves.  Although, Marty is there to help the shopping experience and create a safe environment, we think otherwise.  Here’s our 5 reasons why the Giant Supermarket robot Marty is a terrible idea.

 

They’ll Terrify Kids

scared baby

To this day “kid friendly” characters such as Chuck E. Cheese and Ronald McDonald strike fear into the hearts of children.  If a cute and cuddly furry costume will have kids freaking out, what do you expect from a googly-eyed robot?  Marty’s eyes are so creepy they’d make Gritty jealous.  Well at least we know one thing, parents will most likely be less concerned with their kids wondering off with Marty patrolling the aisles.

 

Ever Had That Feeling Someone is Watching You?

spying

Giant might as well just have Rockwell’s “Somebody’s Watching Me” on repeat.  Can you imagine the creep levels of going to Giants late at night when it’s empty and having a giant wide-eyed robot just appearing out of nowhere?  Sounds like a great plot to a horror movie.  I’d much rather take my business to places with old fashioned surveillance like cameras.

 

Never Watched the Movie iRobot?

irobot

This is self explanatory.  Hate to sound like I’m overreacting but this could just be the beginning of the helpful robots that turn deadly.   As a child we all wondered what the future would be like.  More than likely you envisioned flying cars and everything be automated.  However, robots always had a sense of unpredictability.  Food shopping should be a calm and serene experience and not the feeling of being an extra in iRobot.

 

How Do We Know This Isn’t Some Government Experiment?

conspiracy theory

“Marty is just scanning the floors and shelves for a better shopping experience.” Bullshit!  Marty is more than likely spying on human habits.  Watching us pick out groceries and eavesdropping on our conversations.  Marty cannot be trusted! Be careful what you discuss around Marty and never let him peep inside of your cart.  He’s not to be trusted.

 

We’re All About to Lose Our Jobs!

lost job

It started with self-checkout lanes and that mostly got dismissed as an added convenience.  Now you’re telling me a random robot is roaming the supermarket for my convenience.  Sounds kind of fishy.  When does it stop?  Soon there will be no humans in stores and we’ll all be monitored by Marty type robot associates.  But does this stop at customer service jobs?  Or will this type of automation bleed into other sectors?  Who knows but let’s keep a close eye on things and stay woke

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